In her debut novel “Ghosts,” Dolly Alderton delivers a wickedly observant, poignant, and often hilarious portrait of navigating love, friendship, and family in your early thirties. Known for her memoir “Everything I Know About Love,” Alderton brings her sharp wit and emotional intelligence to fiction, creating a protagonist whose experiences feel startlingly real and universally relatable despite their specificity.
Nina Dean has just turned thirty-two, bought her first flat in London’s Archway, and published a successful cookbook. On paper, she’s living the millennial dream. But as she downloads a dating app for the first time and watches her friends pair off and migrate to the suburbs, Nina finds herself at a crossroads that many women will recognize with a sympathetic wince.
The Modern Dating Landscape: Swipes and Disappearing Acts
What Alderton captures most brilliantly is the bizarre landscape of modern dating—the dictionary of new behaviors that have emerged in the age of dating apps. The term “ghosting” may be familiar to most readers, but Alderton excavates its emotional impact with unflinching clarity. When Nina meets Max, a charismatic accountant who seems too good to be true—telling her on their first date that he’s going to marry her—their intense connection feels like a rare victory in the dating wasteland.
The novel’s exploration of ghosting goes beyond mere dating slang; it becomes a powerful metaphor for all the ways people fade from our lives. As Nina observes:
“Real human people can’t be deleted. We are not living in a dystopian science fiction.”
But as her relationship with Max takes a devastating turn, Nina learns that people can indeed disappear without warning or explanation, leaving behind only digital breadcrumbs and confusing memories.
Friendship in Flux: The Social Shifting of Thirties
One of the novel’s strongest elements is its unvarnished portrayal of how friendships evolve—or dissolve—in one’s thirties. Nina’s relationship with her oldest friend Katherine undergoes particular strain as Katherine builds her suburban life with husband and children. Their interactions are painfully authentic, oscillating between deep understanding and complete disconnect:
“Resetting the factory settings of a friendship is such a difficult thing to do. I knew it would take a long and uncomfortable conversation for us to say all we wanted to say and I couldn’t think of a time it would be convenient for us both to do it.”
Lola, Nina’s perpetually single friend, provides both comic relief and emotional ballast as she hunts for love with unrelenting optimism. Their friendship feels lived-in and real—complete with shared jokes, drunken late-night conversations, and a “Schadenfreude Shelf” of stories about others’ misfortunes to make themselves feel better about their own lives.
Family Matters: The Most Heartbreaking Ghost Story
While the romantic plotline drives much of the narrative, the true emotional core of “Ghosts” by Dolly Alderton lies in Nina’s relationship with her father, who is slowly disappearing into dementia. These scenes are rendered with such tender precision that they elevate the novel far beyond standard romantic comedy fare:
“My dad, so curious and confident, my father the headmaster—I had never seen him this tiny. Cowering into himself. Clinging on to Mum. I’d never seen him this tiny.”
The family dynamics—including Nina’s mother’s baffling decision to change her name from Nancy to Mandy and take up literary salons and church activities—provide both comic relief and profound insight into how we cope with loss. Nina’s mother’s emotional breakthrough in the hospital, when she finally admits her fear of her husband’s decline, is among the novel’s most affecting moments.
Alderton’s Prose: Sharp, Funny, and Devastatingly Accurate
What makes “Ghosts” stand out is Dolly Alderton’s prose—equal parts incisive social commentary and emotional vulnerability. Her observations about everything from hen parties to men who refuse to choose a location for dates are laugh-out-loud funny, while her reflections on love and loss cut deep.
Strengths of the Novel:
- Character development – Nina is flawed, funny, and fully realized
- Dialogue – Conversations crackle with authenticity and wit
- Social observation – Alderton captures the peculiarities of modern urban life with deadly accuracy
- Emotional depth – The father-daughter relationship adds profound weight
- Humor – The book is genuinely funny even in its most painful moments
Where It Could Be Stronger:
- Plot predictability – Some story beats can be anticipated early on
- Secondary character development – A few supporting characters remain somewhat one-dimensional
- Narrative pacing – The middle section occasionally meanders
- Resolution – Some readers might find the ending a bit neat
Beyond the Love Story: A Novel About Modern Life
While “Ghosts” by Dolly Alderton centers on Nina’s romantic disappointments, it’s ultimately about something larger—how we construct meaning in a world where traditional milestones have become optional, where technology has transformed human connection, and where caregiving for aging parents collides with our own adult growing pains.
Nina’s neighbor Angelo initially appears to be a villain in her narrative—a nightmare neighbor playing loud music at night and putting the wrong items in the recycling. Their eventual connection demonstrates Alderton’s interest in subverting expectations and revealing the humanity behind our snap judgments.
Similarly, Nina’s reckoning with her ghostly ex (both Max and Joe) allows Alderton to explore how we create and sustain narratives about our romantic lives, sometimes at the expense of seeing people as they truly are.
Comparisons and Literary Context
Fans of Nora Ephron’s sharp observations, Phoebe Waller-Bridge’s “Fleabag,” or Sally Rooney’s conversations about class and connection will find much to appreciate in Alderton’s style. “Ghosts” by Dolly Alderton sits comfortably alongside other recent novels exploring millennial womanhood, like Candice Carty-Williams’ “Queenie” or Emma Jane Unsworth’s “Adults,” but brings its own particular warmth and humor to the genre.
Unlike her memoir “Everything I Know About Love,” which focused primarily on friendship, “Ghosts” examines romantic relationships with the same unflinching honesty while expanding its scope to include family dynamics and aging. Alderton has successfully translated her gift for personal essay into compelling fiction.
Final Verdict: A Voice of a Generation Finding Its Fictional Form
“Ghosts” by Dolly Alderton isn’t perfect—what debut novel is?—but it’s remarkably assured, emotionally resonant, and often brilliantly funny. Alderton has captured something essential about being a woman in her early thirties in the 2020s, about watching parents age, friendships evolve, and relationships form and dissolve in the digital age.
The novel’s greatest strength is how it balances humor with heartbreak. You’ll laugh at Nina’s dating app observations, cringe at her hen-do experiences, and likely tear up at her father’s slow disappearance. Most impressively, Alderton makes you care deeply about Nina’s journey without resorting to sentimentality or easy answers.
In one poignant scene, Nina reflects: “I think everyone can see themselves here, it’s like really attractive people—everyone thinks they belong with one. Everyone thinks the hottest person in the room is their soulmate.” This observation about a London neighborhood could apply to the novel itself: many readers will see their own experiences reflected in these pages, making the specific universal.
For anyone navigating the complicated terrain of modern relationships—romantic, platonic, or familial—”Ghosts” offers both recognition and revelation. It’s a promising fictional debut from a writer who understands how we live now and, more importantly, how we feel about it.
Who Should Read This Book?
- Fans of smart, contemporary women’s fiction
- Readers who enjoyed Alderton’s memoir “Everything I Know About Love“
- Anyone who has experienced dating apps, ghosting, or friendship evolutions
- Those dealing with aging parents or family transitions
- People who appreciate humor alongside emotional depth
“Ghosts” by Dolly Alderton is a thoroughly modern novel that captures both the comedy and tragedy of life in your early thirties with remarkable precision. Alderton has established herself as not just a memoirist but a fiction writer of considerable talent, and readers will eagerly await her next offering.
