Elissa Sussman’s latest offering, Totally and Completely Fine, arrives as a bold departure from the typical romance formula. This isn’t your grandmother’s meet-cute story—it’s a raw, honest examination of what it means to rebuild yourself after devastating loss while still having room for new love. The novel follows Lauren Parker, a forty-something widowed mother navigating the treacherous waters of grief, teenage rebellion, and unexpected attraction to a charismatic actor thirteen years her junior.
Set against the backdrop of small-town Montana, the story alternates between Lauren’s past with her late husband Spencer and her present-day encounter with Ben Walsh, a devilishly handsome actor working on her movie star brother’s latest film. What emerges is not just a romance, but a meditation on how the human heart can expand to hold both sorrow and joy simultaneously.
The Architecture of Memory and Present Desire
Sussman employs a clever dual-timeline structure that weaves between “Then” and “Now” chapters, allowing readers to understand the depth of Lauren’s loss while witnessing her tentative steps toward healing. The “Then” chapters reveal the tender, ordinary moments of her marriage to Spencer—pizza dough in the freezer, late-night conversations about dream houses, the comfortable rhythms of a love that felt permanent. These scenes are rendered with such specificity that Spencer becomes a tangible presence on the page, making his absence all the more poignant.
The alternating structure serves the story brilliantly, creating emotional resonance without overwhelming the reader with grief. When Lauren hesitates to pursue Ben, we understand her reluctance not as melodrama but as the realistic response of someone whose world was shattered by loss. The past isn’t presented as something to “get over” but as a living part of Lauren’s present, which feels refreshingly honest in a genre that often treats grief as an obstacle to overcome rather than a permanent part of the human experience.
Complex Characters Navigating Real Problems
Lauren Parker emerges as one of romance literature’s most compelling protagonists precisely because she refuses to be easily categorized. She’s neither the grieving widow who needs saving nor the strong single mother who has it all figured out. Instead, Sussman presents us with a woman who contains multitudes—fierce protectiveness toward her daughter Lena, lingering anger at her late husband for leaving her, genuine attraction to Ben, and deep uncertainty about what she deserves.
Her relationship with thirteen-year-old Lena provides some of the novel’s most authentic moments. The mother-daughter dynamic feels lived-in, capturing the particular hell of parenting a grieving teenager while managing your own loss. Lena’s anger—at her uncle Gabe’s past addiction, at her mother’s growing interest in Ben, at the unfairness of losing her father—never feels manufactured for drama but emerges naturally from her circumstances.
Ben Walsh could have easily fallen into the typical romance hero trap of being too perfect, but Sussman gives him genuine depth. His past relationships reveal a pattern of heartbreak, his career concerns feel real rather than cosmetic, and his growing affection for both Lauren and Lena develops organically. The age gap between him and Lauren is addressed head-on rather than glossed over, with both characters grappling with the societal implications and their own insecurities about the difference.
Where the Story Stumbles: Pacing and Secondary Characters
While Totally and Completely Fine succeeds admirably in its central emotional journey, it occasionally falters in pacing and subplot development. The middle section drags somewhat as Lauren repeatedly pulls away from Ben only to be drawn back, creating a repetitive push-pull dynamic that occasionally tests reader patience. The pattern of attraction-retreat-attraction feels realistic for someone processing grief, but narratively it sometimes stalls forward momentum.
The small-town Montana setting, while atmospheric, occasionally feels more like a backdrop than a living, breathing place. Secondary characters like Allyson, Lauren’s best friend and business partner, serve their plot functions well enough but lack the dimensional quality that makes the main characters so compelling. The movie production subplot provides useful context but sometimes feels perfunctory, existing mainly to justify Ben’s presence in Montana rather than adding meaningful texture to the story.
Lauren’s relationship with her famous brother Gabe creates some interesting family dynamics, particularly around Lena’s anger about his past addiction, but these threads could have been developed more fully. The novel occasionally feels like it’s juggling more themes than it can adequately explore in its length.
Sussman’s Evolving Voice and Craft
Readers familiar with Sussman’s previous work will recognize her commitment to writing messy, realistic relationships, but Totally and Completely Fine represents a maturation of her voice. Her previous novels Funny You Should Ask and Once More with Feeling explored themes of second chances and complicated relationships, but this latest effort tackles heavier emotional territory with increased confidence.
The prose throughout is clean and engaging, with moments of genuine beauty particularly in the grief-focused passages. Sussman has a gift for capturing the specific details that make emotional moments feel universal—the unopened pizza dough in the freezer, the white cross marking the accident site, the careful way Ben handles Spencer’s scarf. These details accumulate to create emotional weight without ever feeling manipulative.
The dialogue crackles with authenticity, particularly in the family scenes where years of shared history inform every exchange. Lauren’s voice feels distinct and genuine, neither too polished nor artificially rough, capturing the exhaustion and wariness of someone rebuilding their life piece by piece.
Themes That Resonate Beyond Romance
What elevates Totally and Completely Fine above typical contemporary romance is its willingness to grapple with big questions about life, death, and human resilience. The novel asks how we honor the dead while still choosing to live, how we protect our children while allowing them to experience their own grief, and how we open ourselves to new love without betraying old bonds.
The title itself, drawn from Lauren’s final realization that she doesn’t need to be perfect to be worthy of love, encapsulates the novel’s central message about self-acceptance. This isn’t a story about grief being “cured” by new love, but rather about learning to hold space for multiple truths simultaneously—that loss is permanent, that healing is possible, and that the heart’s capacity for love is far greater than we imagine.
The exploration of small-town dynamics adds another layer of complexity, examining how communities both support and constrain those experiencing loss. The way Lauren navigates others’ expectations about how she should grieve, how long she should wait before dating, and how she should present herself as a single mother feels painfully realistic.
The Verdict: A Romance with Emotional Depth
Totally and Completely Fine succeeds where many contemporary romances fail by refusing to offer easy answers to complex emotional questions. While it occasionally struggles with pacing and could benefit from deeper exploration of its supporting characters, the central love story between Lauren and Ben feels earned and emotionally honest.
Sussman has crafted a novel that trusts its readers to handle difficult emotions while still delivering the satisfaction romance readers seek. The relationship development feels organic, the obstacles feel genuine rather than manufactured, and the resolution honors both the reality of grief and the possibility of new beginnings.
This is a romance for readers who want their love stories served with a side of real life—messy, complicated, and ultimately deeply moving. It’s a book that understands that the most meaningful relationships often begin not with instant passion but with the simple recognition of another person’s humanity.
Similar Reads for Romance Lovers
Readers who connect with Totally and Completely Fine might also enjoy:
- The Romantic Agenda by Claire Kann – Another romance that deals honestly with family dynamics and personal growth
- Take a Hint, Dani Brown by Talia Hibbert – For complex heroines navigating career and relationship expectations
- Beach Read by Emily Henry – Explores grief and healing through unexpected romance
- The Kiss Quotient by Helen Hoang – Features characters dealing with personal challenges within romantic relationships
- The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo by Taylor Jenkins Reid – For readers interested in stories about love, loss, and second chances
Totally and Completely Fine stands as a testament to the power of romance fiction to tackle serious themes while still delivering emotional satisfaction. It’s a book that honors both the permanence of loss and the possibility of joy, proving that sometimes the most beautiful love stories are the ones that acknowledge life’s complexities rather than trying to wish them away.
